So this was my horoscope on Friendster...

Even if they accuse you of being idealistic, don't let go of your dreams -- ever.

If you're feeling bored, stuck in a rut or held up by circumstances beyond your control, hang tough. It's understandable for you to feel like this, but soon, you'll be feeling like you've suddenly turned into a magnet for admirers who are just as responsible, intense and focused as you are. Treat yourself. Take in a show or call a loved one and make a date. You won't want to be alone.

It really is so weird how little things like that can speak to/of one's inner thoughts... woof.

Been having that fairly usual for me post-really-good-concert depression. Wondering if it's just tiredness from staying up late added to stressful times at work, or if it's woken up some "thing" inside that I'm usually able to keep numbed out/pushed down. That sympathetic string analogy. It's probably some combination of all of the above honestly. I really ought to be trying to play guitar or making something or whatnot. Although this actual writing for me is probably theraputic too. It's the websurfing for so long before getting to this part that's not healthy. Plus I keep thinking things I want to write in my head but not catching them down. lost em. sad.

I really need to do more creative stuff. Just whatever right now. Even if it sucks, no censoring, just for creating and healing. I was remembering that quote again, "The opposite of war isn't peace, it's creativity." I'm not sure if that's quite right, but I really like it. I think all three together are like the cycle of life - create, maintain, destroy - sattva, rajas, tamas - creativity, peace, war. I really think that's part of why crafting and knitting and such have become SO popular these last several years, it's our small way of compensating for all the destruction. By creating.

I've been trying to take artistic photos and post them on Flickr as a quick fix, and it's fun, but the singing needs to start again soon.

Can't get enough of "Young James Dean" by Girlyman. The guitar is so driving, and the harmonies are beautiful. Sort of a weird song to get stuck in the head, people might call ME crazy if I walked around actually singing it, heh. Worked out to their album at the gym last night too. Not exactly what I'd normally think of as exercise music, but it kept me going. Enough upbeat songs mixed in the album to keep me pumped up.

I MUST do something at the open mic next week. Read a poem or two if nothing else. For reals. Ought to also get out and promote it and get it all fired up again. I think it has all the potential still there. Cycles and all.