catching up on my music theory homework. It's very dry stuff that, for me, involves a LOT of counting on my fingers over and over again. At least so far everything CAN be counted on my fingers. It's the whole backwards and forwards alphabet starting from anywhere between A and G that has me spinning.
Have been wanting cookies for the past couple days, and finally gave in before getting down to the homework, but with them made I really had no excuses. Bummed there was no milk to go with them, but it's probably better as I still have a wee bit of congestion.
Had coffee and a scone at the new Paradiso branch in Everybody's today. Corrected one of my assignments from last week. Intervals. grrr. Was getting really mad because no matter how many times I checked and counted and looked on the virtual keyboard I kept getting a perfect 3rd. Except there aren't any perfect 3rds, just perfect 4ths and 5ths. It's called a major 3rd. doh!
Had to confess my utter lack of maths at work today when I was asked to total up my hours "real quick" and had to admit it would probably take me a long time and that the whole calculating hours things is one of my biggest weaknesses. sigh. Luckily the other hourly guy had a formula that we were able to pop in to the spreadsheet, drop down and it WAS real quick. woof.
Is my brain truly just not wired for this math and arithmetic stuff? It's always been hard for me, since grade school, and it hasn't really gotten any easier. I know the fundamentals of what I need to do to figure out the answers, but I can't snap calculate things. So I can always figure it out eventually, it just takes me waaay long.
But I was able to pick out a bit of the melody of "I'm Flying" from Peter Pan once I figured out it was build on ascending triads. Kind of shockingly simple, and effective - it flies up the keyboard just like the kids fly up in the air, with a couple little blips I had to rustle out by ear. So I might not have a head, but I have an ear. Or my ear is quicker than my head? And neither is great yet but neither is horrible horrible, just the ear is faster. This goes back to FEELING the guitar doesn't it?
Showing posts with label feeling. Show all posts
Showing posts with label feeling. Show all posts
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Monday, November 17, 2008
I did it
I picked up my guitar for all of 3 minutes before work and I FELT it. It was out of tune and has a little buzz that I should get looked at if I even knew where/who/how, but in spite of all that, I FELT it. And it felt good. I need more of that.
The new buzz around the web today seems to be that it takes 10,000 hours to become an expert at something. Apparently that's 5 years of 40 hours/week. Damn. At the rate I'm going I'm pretty screwed. But then again, I don't supposed you have to be an expert at something before you start doing it. Indeed, you HAVE to start doing it to become an expert!
More reason to take more classes, at the same time, to really dive in. But I'm scared, I'm way behind with my ONE class, I don't know how I'd keep up with 2 or more! Not to mention I don't know how I'd pay for them. If I sell my car that will pay for this one and my next one, but after that?
I'm SO loathe to go into debt in such a big way again. I still have $600 more left from my B.A. that I'm letting sit because it has a lower interest rate. And it's not something like going to get my nursing degree where you KNOW there's a need for nurses and you're guaranteed to get a job that'll pay it back. For all I know I'll take a bunch of classes only to find out that I suck, or am mediocre at best, and that I should stick to promoting the real talent.
Seriously, how terrifying is that, to throw a huge bunch of money at something when I have absolutely no idea of the outcome? It's like gambling! I suppose on the one hand it's like a vote of confidence in myself, that I DO deserve it and I DO have something worthy of developing, and that THIS is the path to get to it. I know that a bunch of people I admire have gone down this path before, but it's not like a magic wand either, I have to to do the work. So that's the question - do I have the confidence and the drive?
The new buzz around the web today seems to be that it takes 10,000 hours to become an expert at something. Apparently that's 5 years of 40 hours/week. Damn. At the rate I'm going I'm pretty screwed. But then again, I don't supposed you have to be an expert at something before you start doing it. Indeed, you HAVE to start doing it to become an expert!
More reason to take more classes, at the same time, to really dive in. But I'm scared, I'm way behind with my ONE class, I don't know how I'd keep up with 2 or more! Not to mention I don't know how I'd pay for them. If I sell my car that will pay for this one and my next one, but after that?
I'm SO loathe to go into debt in such a big way again. I still have $600 more left from my B.A. that I'm letting sit because it has a lower interest rate. And it's not something like going to get my nursing degree where you KNOW there's a need for nurses and you're guaranteed to get a job that'll pay it back. For all I know I'll take a bunch of classes only to find out that I suck, or am mediocre at best, and that I should stick to promoting the real talent.
Seriously, how terrifying is that, to throw a huge bunch of money at something when I have absolutely no idea of the outcome? It's like gambling! I suppose on the one hand it's like a vote of confidence in myself, that I DO deserve it and I DO have something worthy of developing, and that THIS is the path to get to it. I know that a bunch of people I admire have gone down this path before, but it's not like a magic wand either, I have to to do the work. So that's the question - do I have the confidence and the drive?
Sunday, November 16, 2008
grumbly cold
I hate how the cold gets into my feet and takes so so long to get out. Really wears me down. And my slippers never seem to be where I can find them easily.
Saw Beauty and the Beast today. Love the Disney movie to bits, one of, if not the favorite movie of all time of mine, and the play doesn't vary very much from the Disney movie, though they added several songs. Diana IS Belle, so adorable and spunky. And nearly all of the children in the audience thought she was Belle too. It was amazing and adorable to hear them call out "There's Belle!" and then after the show they approached her with such awe. Some were so shy they turned their faces into their mom's jackets. Kind of like meeting Santa or something. She was so gracious and sweet to them though, I think most overcame their fear.
The guy who played Gaston was absolutely amazing as well. He really got into it and looked very much like the cartoon. Hilarious. Loved their dance with the beer mugs in the tavern. And the "Be Our Guest" number was GREAT too. I finally figured out that the "cheese graters" were laundry baskets turned upside down and painted silver, brilliant!
The whole thing was 3 hours though. I have mixed feelings, part of the reason why it took so long was they completely changed the set for every location in the play and there were 7 scenes in the first act and 6 in the second. But the set pieces they had were SO clever that it was almost worth it. Lots of rolling panels that could be flipped around, and also unfolded, plus a big wall of tri-paneled scenes that would rotate. So for the size of their stage and the number of scenes and the amount of time they had, it was pretty astounding actually.
Came home and did some bills and had a money freakout. I have enough to cover my basic bills and I'm paying G back for my online courses so we don't have to rack up too much credit card interest, but there's not much to spare at all and it's frustrating. I've definitely gotten to a point where I don't just go around buying junk every week (well, passed that point a long time ago.) but there are a few bigger things I want that I don't NEED and therefore I'm not willing to just dump on the credit card, but I don't really see being able to save up for anytime in the near future either. For example, new laptop, video camera, iPhone, colored highlights, a real blog design. None of those things are passing whims either, I've wanted them all for over a year, and in some cases much longer.
I'm certain beyond a shadow of a doubt that I could get more work if I wanted it in a matter of a few phone calls at minimum and a few months at the most. I've actually turned down a few offers lately in the name of making sure I have more time for my music. But I haven't been putting that time to much music use. Not sure what the story is there. Well, there's the theory course, I HAVE been doing that (although I'm behind right now) but that doesn't involve hands on my guitar.
I used to get such joy out of it - just feeling the vibrational transfer from the body of the guitar to my body made me feel so good, so alive. My head critic is so in the way I think, so worried about how it sounds, is it good enough, interesting enough, will people get bored, will they zone out and miss the lyrics, are the lyrics good enough or are they trite, chatter chatter chatter - I forget what it FEELS like to play the guitar.
I'll have to look for that tomorrow. Force myself to make time for it and feel it out. I might need some new strings. My dad always says putting new strings on is like getting a whole new guitar.
Anyway, the whole upset got me real moody and I didn't work on my theory homework or my blog for the radio show on Tuesday. (Which should be a really good one I'm very excited about.) Although I AM kind of waiting to hear back if there are going to be 1 or 2 people calling in first. But I'll have to just put something up tomorrow morning if I don't hear back by then. The homework is to a point where I'm both behind on this week and have a bunch of old stuff I need to correct, so it feels way overwhelming.
I'm also fairly certain that I'm having a hard time handling all of this at the moment (it's not like it's really much different any other time of the month in terms of workload or finances) because of hormones, my face is definitely predicting things. Doesn't seem fair that one has to feel ugly AND emotional all at once.
It will be very interesting to look back over this month of posts and see if I can find any greater rhythms to it, I feel like I've been mostly a downer, but it also feels really good to write, write, write and process things out - for example that thing about how the guitar FEELS came to me as I was writing it, as a result of processing, and I think it's an important revelation.
Last thing, I'm worried about some of my online friends and it's a strange thing. I ONLY know them from online, but the connections we have feel important and real, and since they are musical connections they are ones that I don't have too many of in my offline life. One guy's MySpace page disappeared completely, I'm not sure if it was from his side or MySpace's that it got taken down, but I know he has health problems (not what, but that they are bad enough he's been offline for weeks at a time). He's always come back before, but his page has never disappeared before, so I don't know what that means. The other is a girl who just found out she has MS. I *think* she pretty much supports herself through her music, so I'm not sure how that is going to affect her life. She is super spunky and positive and a fighter, so if anyone can get through it's her. But the strangest thing is since I only know these people from online, if anything happens to them where they can't get back online again, I won't have a way of finding out what happened. It's not like I can track down their mom or something like I could with my friends I know offline. Weird and beautiful world this is. Strange.
Saw Beauty and the Beast today. Love the Disney movie to bits, one of, if not the favorite movie of all time of mine, and the play doesn't vary very much from the Disney movie, though they added several songs. Diana IS Belle, so adorable and spunky. And nearly all of the children in the audience thought she was Belle too. It was amazing and adorable to hear them call out "There's Belle!" and then after the show they approached her with such awe. Some were so shy they turned their faces into their mom's jackets. Kind of like meeting Santa or something. She was so gracious and sweet to them though, I think most overcame their fear.
The guy who played Gaston was absolutely amazing as well. He really got into it and looked very much like the cartoon. Hilarious. Loved their dance with the beer mugs in the tavern. And the "Be Our Guest" number was GREAT too. I finally figured out that the "cheese graters" were laundry baskets turned upside down and painted silver, brilliant!
The whole thing was 3 hours though. I have mixed feelings, part of the reason why it took so long was they completely changed the set for every location in the play and there were 7 scenes in the first act and 6 in the second. But the set pieces they had were SO clever that it was almost worth it. Lots of rolling panels that could be flipped around, and also unfolded, plus a big wall of tri-paneled scenes that would rotate. So for the size of their stage and the number of scenes and the amount of time they had, it was pretty astounding actually.
Came home and did some bills and had a money freakout. I have enough to cover my basic bills and I'm paying G back for my online courses so we don't have to rack up too much credit card interest, but there's not much to spare at all and it's frustrating. I've definitely gotten to a point where I don't just go around buying junk every week (well, passed that point a long time ago.) but there are a few bigger things I want that I don't NEED and therefore I'm not willing to just dump on the credit card, but I don't really see being able to save up for anytime in the near future either. For example, new laptop, video camera, iPhone, colored highlights, a real blog design. None of those things are passing whims either, I've wanted them all for over a year, and in some cases much longer.
I'm certain beyond a shadow of a doubt that I could get more work if I wanted it in a matter of a few phone calls at minimum and a few months at the most. I've actually turned down a few offers lately in the name of making sure I have more time for my music. But I haven't been putting that time to much music use. Not sure what the story is there. Well, there's the theory course, I HAVE been doing that (although I'm behind right now) but that doesn't involve hands on my guitar.
I used to get such joy out of it - just feeling the vibrational transfer from the body of the guitar to my body made me feel so good, so alive. My head critic is so in the way I think, so worried about how it sounds, is it good enough, interesting enough, will people get bored, will they zone out and miss the lyrics, are the lyrics good enough or are they trite, chatter chatter chatter - I forget what it FEELS like to play the guitar.
I'll have to look for that tomorrow. Force myself to make time for it and feel it out. I might need some new strings. My dad always says putting new strings on is like getting a whole new guitar.
Anyway, the whole upset got me real moody and I didn't work on my theory homework or my blog for the radio show on Tuesday. (Which should be a really good one I'm very excited about.) Although I AM kind of waiting to hear back if there are going to be 1 or 2 people calling in first. But I'll have to just put something up tomorrow morning if I don't hear back by then. The homework is to a point where I'm both behind on this week and have a bunch of old stuff I need to correct, so it feels way overwhelming.
I'm also fairly certain that I'm having a hard time handling all of this at the moment (it's not like it's really much different any other time of the month in terms of workload or finances) because of hormones, my face is definitely predicting things. Doesn't seem fair that one has to feel ugly AND emotional all at once.
It will be very interesting to look back over this month of posts and see if I can find any greater rhythms to it, I feel like I've been mostly a downer, but it also feels really good to write, write, write and process things out - for example that thing about how the guitar FEELS came to me as I was writing it, as a result of processing, and I think it's an important revelation.
Last thing, I'm worried about some of my online friends and it's a strange thing. I ONLY know them from online, but the connections we have feel important and real, and since they are musical connections they are ones that I don't have too many of in my offline life. One guy's MySpace page disappeared completely, I'm not sure if it was from his side or MySpace's that it got taken down, but I know he has health problems (not what, but that they are bad enough he's been offline for weeks at a time). He's always come back before, but his page has never disappeared before, so I don't know what that means. The other is a girl who just found out she has MS. I *think* she pretty much supports herself through her music, so I'm not sure how that is going to affect her life. She is super spunky and positive and a fighter, so if anyone can get through it's her. But the strangest thing is since I only know these people from online, if anything happens to them where they can't get back online again, I won't have a way of finding out what happened. It's not like I can track down their mom or something like I could with my friends I know offline. Weird and beautiful world this is. Strange.
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